Deadbeat fathers...

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
Having a discussion with somebody just now who was ranting and raving about a deadbeat dad..and how he wasnt doing this and that... we were joined by another girl who chimed in about deadbeat fathers as well.. the first one had the man's first child.. the second one was the man's second or third child mother... on asking.. the first man didn't do much for the child.. the second man does everything for his previous child(ren) but wont take responsibility for this last child and is a deadbeat to this child.. the second child mother wanted to have a child for the man cos she saw how good he treated the child before hers but when she had his child that he apparently didnt want. he became a deadbeat..

so i'm asking.. are the mothers partly to blame for choosing a deadbeat as their child's father? or is the whole situation wholely and solely on the men.. like especially in cases where the man doesnt want to have a child and the woman has the child anyway...

and with "deadbeatism"... is it worse when the man is making money and spends none on the child.. or when the father is just one of them wutless men who aint really trying to help out the mother?

also which is worse.. claiming a child as yours and being a deadbeat.. or denying the child is yours and being a deadbeat..
 
S

Spranga

Guest
yes mothers are partly to blame... youngins in particular does just want now 4 now and unintentionally end up preggers by a bum ass nigga fresh outta HS w/ no job... so now she's successfully segwayed her deadbeat bf/fb into a deadbeat dad and the troubles begin.
 

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
yea.. cos at what point does the man be a deadbeat.. only when he not doing things for the child.. or were there markers that indicated he doesnt take care of himself and his responsibilities..
 

TC

Steuuuupssss!
This is an interesting question and it will have many takes.

Mine are:

As a man when you know you had sex with a woman and your sperm enters her vagina, (yes I put it so because he might think the sex is "protected" where it really wasn´t)...the woman can get pregnant. when she does, you have to step up to the plate, because if you wasn´t deh, yuh name wouldna call. So from that point of view, I think men are 100% responsible for deadbeatness when they are being deadbeat.

Then there are the cases where the women are just being angry jennyasses, and really oppressing the men and using the child/ren as ammunition, effectively forcing the man to become a deadbeat...I mean, come on, he is only a man and there´s only so much he can put up with....then I think it´s somewhat the woman´s fault that he´s a deadbeat dad...he "might" only take financial responsibility..and to me that´s just not enough, so he´s labeled deadbeat.
 

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
but TC. do you think that sometimes women have to take responsibility for fckin with a deadbeat in the first place? especially if she knows he got other kids that he dont take care of.. or he says he dont want not trying to have any more kids or kids right now? in situations like that? is it all him? if you see a man hustling all over the place and can barely take care of himself.. would you put urself in a position to possibly breed for him?

also.. men who claim and dont support. worse than men who dont claim at all?
 

TC

Steuuuupssss!
but TC. do you think that sometimes women have to take responsibility for fckin with a deadbeat in the first place? especially if she knows he got other kids that he dont take care of.. or he says he dont want not trying to have any more kids or kids right now? in situations like that? is it all him? if you see a man hustling all over the place and can barely take care of himself.. would you put urself in a position to possibly breed for him?

also.. men who claim and dont support. worse than men who dont claim at all?

Yes, a woman should take responsibilty too. but a deadbeat to one woman´s kids may not necessarily be a deadbeat to another. Take for example my father...deadbeat no skünt...was visibly deadbeat...yet another woman rush in there and had children with him, and he took care of his kids with her up until today. He completely forsook us, and now does wanna be boasting bout us and our accomplishments and doctor title and all kinda ass fart! Steups!
 
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TC

Steuuuupssss!
also.. men who claim and dont support. worse than men who dont claim at all?
To answer this bit...as a woman now looking back, I would have prefered to have a father who claimed and didn´t support (financially) if he genuinely didn´t have the money, but was at least there, representing the presence of a father in my life.

Men who don´t claim at all may have a point, because he might know for sure the child isn´t his...but where he knows he was there(in the vagina) and just don´t claim without DNA test...he should be beaten and spat upon imo.
 

dollbabi

Earth Angel
Deadbeat dads are fully responsible for failing their children on a daily basis. The woman is responsible for the bad decision to deal with the father. However, from there the man is responsible for his action or rather lack of action in the child's life. The man chooses daily to neglect his child and those continuous poor decisions have nothing to do with the mother, who also make the choice daily to be involved in the child's life.
 
yea but thats not an option most exercise..
sounds the same as sayin you have a nuclear weapon. and you rather fire it than get the united nations involved..

it takes two to make a child..

those who have kids for obvious dead beats i have no remorse for..

those who abandon their offsrping, but grow another brood for another woman and take care of that clutch is who i would take an issue with (certain circumstances permitting)
 

Missmayling

Registered User
yea but thats not an option most exercise..
why have a child for man your not married to or cannot support on your own?? this is a backward mentality that needs to stop with women. Then they call the men dead beats?? HA!! These are the women that will never learn and will spit out a few more kids for different men, yet blaming the men for their stupid choices.
I bet you if they cut off child support and welfare, half these idiots will learn to use protection.
 
why have a child for man your not married to or cannot support on your own?? this is a backward mentality that needs to stop with women. Then they call the men dead beats?? HA!! These are the women that will never learn and will spit out a few more kids for different men, yet blaming the men for their stupid choices.
I bet you if they cut off child support and welfare, half these idiots will learn to use protection.
i said some mean things about you in the friday thread.. i take it back
 

ladyrastafari

Notchilous
why have a child for man your not married to or cannot support on your own?? this is a backward mentality that needs to stop with women. Then they call the men dead beats?? HA!! These are the women that will never learn and will spit out a few more kids for different men, yet blaming the men for their stupid choices.
I bet you if they cut off child support and welfare, half these idiots will learn to use protection.

i totally agree
 
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CocoErotika

Guest
sometime we have to take responsibility for things we dont want to. its called being an adult.

personal accountability. finger pointing is for children. too many immature, mildly retarded people walking around our community... heaven help them


this is like arguing over who wash the dishes because they didnt choose the kind of food to cook.

"who tell you make curry...I never wanted curry in the first place... you wash the pot"


fukking petty and childish
 
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ladyrastafari

Notchilous
sometime we have to take responsibility for things we dont want to. its called being an adult.

personal accountability. finger pointing is for children. too many immature, mildly retarded people walking around our community... heaven help them
true that.. but do you think that some of the mothers who have children need to take responsibility for pickin that individual.... especially the ones who are always calling them out as deadbeats..
 

dollbabi

Earth Angel
true that.. but do you think that some of the mothers who have children need to take responsibility for pickin that individual.... especially the ones who are always calling them out as deadbeats..
Take responsibility by doing what? All they can say is that they made a bad choice. That's it. There is nothing more to say about it. The child is here and as long as the man keeps choosing not to involve himself with his child, he is a deadbeat. They aren't wrong for saying so.
 
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