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Thread: Speaking of THOUGHT...why not have no kids if everything else is working?

  1. #1
    Get your passport & come ! EloquenceInc is offline
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    Speaking of THOUGHT...why not have no kids if everything else is working?

    I asked a guy if everything else is working out great with a woman mentally, financially, physically, sexually, emotionally, connections , conversations and common goals all THERE, she's your best friend, BUT the one issue you have with her is she either can't have kids or it is potentially deadly for her to have kids...why would a guy who has BEEN in the dating world quite a while and experienced the foolishness that is out there pass over all the great things that are WORKING with a woman he loves, because he has no children and she has already and can't or shouldn't have any more? Why if everything else working and working GREAT can a CHOICE not be made to choose to keep a great woman and NOT have children if it will cost him the woman he loves? Nuff man only want children cause society train them to want it, they are not THINKING they have the OPTION to choose a woman for the woman she is in their lives, not the kids she can give him. He said he had never thought of that and that was actually a good point about choosing to keep the woman and just make a choice to not have kids, ever, or maybe adopt or something.

    So men if a woman was the best thing you had encountered after maybe 5 or 10 years of duds...would you pass her over if she can't give you kids and you had none yet, or would you choose love over children and keep the woman that was naturally compatible with you in the other 9 out of 10 ways that matter?

    And i realize i forgot to suggest something else radical to him too: surrogate parent...if she can actually have kids but it dangerous for her to do so, instead of spoiling the relationship because you think no future can exist with a woman who can't have kids, you can get the sperm and egg together in someone else's body and bring it to term, then raise the kid or kids...if a relationship was just so so then hey, yeah, end it anyway but there is no way i would be dating around for 5 years or 10 years trying to find Mr. Right and when i finally find and a man who makes me happy to come home to him, the fact that he wants a child from me is going to be the dealbreaker if everything else works like never before...but men, Jamaican men especially, never seem to stop and think yes, i CAN have a wife and enjoy her without BREEDING her...I have seen white men who are in this situation but not any west indians...if you know any who have made this choice and are happy, let's hear about it!

    An ex of mine told me i need to compromise on something, and this kid thing...i guess it's not going to fly so well with Jamaican guys especially...but i hardly meet any anyway just trying to see if any of the ones i know will realize the species won't dead out if they specifically don't help the population out...I'm like what so all i'm worth to a guy is ability to breed, alllll the other great stuff about me don't matter if him can't or shouldn't get mi pregnant?

    i know this is like heresy but discuss!
    Who has eyes to see, let them see...

  2. #2
    Registered User Inquistive is offline
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    Lol

    Nobody gonna read all of that.

  3. #3
    Searching For Answers Hello BKLYN is offline
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    Good questions.. That is the ideal way of thinking... love for the woman should over-ride the desire to breed her, and it should be that way... But you know what society instructs and ingrains in us and how society's expectations gets in the way of the ideal
    the healthy man does not torture others - generally it is the tortured who turn into torturers.

    Carl G. Jung

  4. #4
    Gladiator
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    Everyone has their own desires and wants for a fulfilling life. Who is me or you to question what they want ? Who is me or you to say society is wrong/right and they are right/wrong ? What benchmark are we using to judge them ? Are we using our own wants and desires as a benchmark to judge ?

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    Registered User Tha Biz is offline
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  6. #6
    Black Madonna
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    people are poor choice makers. they would rather sacrifice a lot for a little bit, the long term for immediate gratification and not know how to balance to get everything

  7. #7
    where de crix Oneshot's Avatar Oneshot is offline
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    why the surprise

    people undergo in vitro treatment when they could adopt.

    it is part of our wiring to want to create something that reflects us
    Triniminx likes this.

  8. #8
    Registered User Minxy is offline
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    Quote Originally Posted by Oneshot View Post
    why the surprise

    people undergo in vitro treatment when they could adopt.

    it is part of our wiring to want to create something that reflects us
    u zeeit

  9. #9
    █♥█ TORONTONIAN █♥█ TweetaFineeta's Avatar TweetaFineeta is offline
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    Honestly... I think because most men, aside from the ones who simply don't want children, want to spread their sed/legacy. They want a lion cub, preferably a male first, who can carry on their legacy.

    If they choose this wonderful woman who cannot have children, they have to give up having a legacy in their eyes..

    That is how I see it.

  10. #10
    Who feels it knows it! Georgeflash's Avatar Georgeflash is offline
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    If she don't mind me breeding one or few women on the side then she can get wife up yes. Hypothetically.
    Say no to drugs.
    Smoke weed.

  11. #11
    Black Madonna
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    Quote Originally Posted by TweetaFineeta View Post
    Honestly... I think because most men, aside from the ones who simply don't want children, want to spread their sed/legacy. They want a lion cub, preferably a male first, who can carry on their legacy.

    If they choose this wonderful woman who cannot have children, they have to give up having a legacy in their eyes..

    That is how I see it.
    is that why these fertile, ratchet beyotches stay pregnant? men would rather breed them, than go without

  12. #12
    █♥█ TORONTONIAN █♥█ TweetaFineeta's Avatar TweetaFineeta is offline
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    Quote Originally Posted by Black Madonna View Post
    is that why these fertile, ratchet beyotches stay pregnant? men would rather breed them, than go without
    that and gross negligence.

  13. #13
    TC
    Steuuuupssss! TC is offline
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brownilus View Post
    I asked a guy if everything else is working out great with a woman mentally, financially, physically, sexually, emotionally, connections , conversations and common goals all THERE, she's your best friend, BUT the one issue you have with her is she either can't have kids or it is potentially deadly for her to have kids...why would a guy who has BEEN in the dating world quite a while and experienced the foolishness that is out there pass over all the great things that are WORKING with a woman he loves, because he has no children and she has already and can't or shouldn't have any more? Why if everything else working and working GREAT can a CHOICE not be made to choose to keep a great woman and NOT have children if it will cost him the woman he loves? Nuff man only want children cause society train them to want it, they are not THINKING they have the OPTION to choose a woman for the woman she is in their lives, not the kids she can give him. He said he had never thought of that and that was actually a good point about choosing to keep the woman and just make a choice to not have kids, ever, or maybe adopt or something.

    So men if a woman was the best thing you had encountered after maybe 5 or 10 years of duds...would you pass her over if she can't give you kids and you had none yet, or would you choose love over children and keep the woman that was naturally compatible with you in the other 9 out of 10 ways that matter?

    And i realize i forgot to suggest something else radical to him too: surrogate parent...if she can actually have kids but it dangerous for her to do so, instead of spoiling the relationship because you think no future can exist with a woman who can't have kids, you can get the sperm and egg together in someone else's body and bring it to term, then raise the kid or kids...if a relationship was just so so then hey, yeah, end it anyway but there is no way i would be dating around for 5 years or 10 years trying to find Mr. Right and when i finally find and a man who makes me happy to come home to him, the fact that he wants a child from me is going to be the dealbreaker if everything else works like never before...but men, Jamaican men especially, never seem to stop and think yes, i CAN have a wife and enjoy her without BREEDING her...I have seen white men who are in this situation but not any west indians...if you know any who have made this choice and are happy, let's hear about it!

    An ex of mine told me i need to compromise on something, and this kid thing...i guess it's not going to fly so well with Jamaican guys especially...but i hardly meet any anyway just trying to see if any of the ones i know will realize the species won't dead out if they specifically don't help the population out...I'm like what so all i'm worth to a guy is ability to breed, alllll the other great stuff about me don't matter if him can't or shouldn't get mi pregnant?

    i know this is like heresy but discuss!
    To me it's about personal choice and being true to ones' self. If one knows one cannot live comfortably in a situation, best not to bother with it.

  14. #14
    Gladiator
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    Quote Originally Posted by TC View Post
    To me it's about personal choice and being true to ones' self. If one knows one cannot live comfortably in a situation, best not to bother with it.
    Yeah i have to agree with this..seem like a responsible man who knows himself and rather not waste his time
    TC likes this.

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