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skeng you talk some sense there.. i never did understand why black american women are always up in arms about white women taking away "their" men .. but it lead the question.. why are black men.. and in this group I include west indian black men, african american black men, african black men, european black men.... not flocking towards them but rather away from them.. I hear stories from men who date black american females and their one thread is "these black chicks are craaaaaaaazy".. and then the women come on the other hand talkin about "men can't deal with a strong black woman"..

since when is being loud and agressive being STRONG? why do so many females think its okay to be portrayed negatively as basically video hoes and hoodrats.. look at how many movies, songs, music videos are made with black women in them and its never anything positive.. and then you say. nah thats the media portrayal and you walk down the block and see the hoodrats well dressed coming from the projects with a coach bag and a 500 dollar fur coat??? Granted this is not every black woman but i always wonder why African American females are given a bad rap? It's very alarming to witness and i'm not even going to front I've found myself limiting my interaction with people (esp females)who seem to embody certain values and aim to live certain lifestyles..

I dont know if it's a RACE thing most times or if it's a CLASS thing.. cos from what i've seen in high school (moneyed high school) .. black girls and black boys did date their white counterparts.. and it was mainly, okay this person is part of my social circle so thats' who i'm goin to deal with..it wasnt about oh he's white or she's black.. indian, white, chinese, middle eastern, black.. people cross dated.. the questions parents asked related to what your parents did? Professionals.. okay.. certain societies. like TnT.. people watch where you live, waht school you went to, what your parents do, all that stuff to decide whether you can make the cut

It migth simply also be a factor of the black man who has moved up in society.. gotten a good job, worked hard to put himself through school, got his own house, car, bnkroll etc.. then decides he doesn't wnat to date Shaquanda or anybody remotely like her because he's not in that mental place anymore where he can deal with "drama" (why are black women always known for drama??).. so he looks for the black women who are OUT of that bottom social class.. he may find one and date and subsequently marry her.. if he doesnt. rather than settle for just a black woman.. he goes outside of the race and finds another woman who meets the standards he wants in a gf/wife.. i mean granted there are some people who just want anything NOT black due to race.. but others simply will take whatever woman in their social class...

I mean it doesnt matter what i bring home to my parents.. purple, yellow, black white green.. they cant be uncouth and unproductive..
I know plenty west indian parents who tell their sons don't bring no black american girls.. they rather they son pick up a white or asian american or another black west indian than a black american.. and these are BLACK parents.. and you have to ask why is this..

I wonder tho.. when these black men pick up with these white women or asians or whatever.. do they marry them? have families with them and generally stick around? do they construct family units with these women? if they do.. then why dont they do the same thing with black women? I am not putting the blame on black women but I'm really trying to find out what is the cause for this problem.. if these black men didnt go for white women.. would they necessarily go for BLACK women? or maybe some other race.. Is that "Tired Black Man" movie on point?

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I speak softly.. and carry a.. yo bump that stick ish.. I carry a H&K UMP .45 cal sub-machine gun

interesting... the silence.. lol

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I speak softly.. and carry a.. yo bump that stick ish.. I carry a H&K UMP .45 cal sub-machine gun

You just drop a heavy dose of stereotypes my fren, which cannot be validated..and if their is truth to them they are not close to being applied to all....remember that even term black american is relative term...I maybe considered black american even though the first time I ever stepped foot outside of my country I was almost 17 and that was only for a few months.

Second..Some of the stuff that you are mentioning are more stereotypical of an underclass, which is typically a reflection of an attenuated culture brought about through structural disadvantage.....some of those streotypes can be made against Jamaican and I am sure Trinis also.

Lastly...the phenom of succesful black men dating out of their race is not an American phenom..it also happens in the U.K where there are no Americans..everybody of clor is either African, Caribbean or can trace their roots directly from either.

well what i am saying is that we dont know for sure if people do inter racial dating due to race solely.it can simply be a matter of class adn standing.. why date somebody from the ghetto of any race when you can date somebody in a different class who might happen to be of a different race...

when you do underclass things you become underclass by choice or by proxy.. so like a statement i always heard "a class horses do not run in g class races"..

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I speak softly.. and carry a.. yo bump that stick ish.. I carry a H&K UMP .45 cal sub-machine gun

The supposition is skewed because it is happening across different countries and black women as an aggregate are far more accomplished than black men....so you are basically saying black women are inherently "ghetto" or are more prediposed to such lifestyle....thus white women are logically the better choice....an upgrade of sorts...the more you grow in prestige you shy away from women who are more akin to your mother, sisters, and aunts.

not so much.. just sometimes the pool of elegible black women may be reduced in the man's locale.. that's all.. I don't really claim to be an expert on this sort of stuff because i don't really care to limit myself to solely dating black men.. if a man is attractive and has the qualities i like then i should reject him cos he isnt black? pscch.

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I speak softly.. and carry a.. yo bump that stick ish.. I carry a H&K UMP .45 cal sub-machine gun

Thats going off little too much guess work or prcise calculation...if we going by probability that would more be an argument why black females should be in more interracial relationships.

I addressed your second point though a bit crude eatlier....peeps will do whatever they want..I was making a point to show her resentment is valid reaction given the social context..and 2 to show why the comparison between interracial and panafrican unions is flawed.

Yes Bago..preach.

If move come New York you turn Priest because you naw get nuh more bushy bushy lol

well i guess i cant really see her point of view as i'm dougla so i really could care less about interracial relationships.. and i really dont stress what other people do in their relationships as its anybody's guess why people fall for the people they fall for.. .. i cant see the historical resentment of white people who date black people.. i've never been socialized to believe that you must ONLY date black people or keep to a certain race....

and also i dont thnk that just because two people are black that means they are on the same boat.. black german and black american and black african and black latino... different views of the world.. same skin but different mindsets.. and then too it can individual differneces on a personal level as well..

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I speak softly.. and carry a.. yo bump that stick ish.. I carry a H&K UMP .45 cal sub-machine gun

That being said..you are not from America so that is understandable...you were not cultured into the historical antongonism of white vs black....hence you are not sensitive to the realities of their concerns....that was the reason kept my definition of interracial rather minute: black male to white female....to fully explicate my point.

very good summary.. ... let me really get down to how i feel about this. it's like black women concern themselves with who black men date.. but you have to wonder.. who is the problem with.. the person out there doing the dating.. or the onlooker... does an indian woman feel that she has to be the spokesman for every romantic choice indian men make? if an indian woman sees an indian man with a chinese woman.. and she disapproves..who really has the problem.. the indian man who is going about his merry life..or the indian woman who feels that she and others like her are being replaced by the indian man for chinese women and other races.. just a thought

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I speak softly.. and carry a.. yo bump that stick ish.. I carry a H&K UMP .45 cal sub-machine gun

For the most part whoever finding a problem with two consenting adults joining a union...however, if the premise for choosing to shun or to go outside of his race or culture is based on the manifestation of something intrinsically wrong..then you can delineate blame to the individual or aspects in a culture that prejudiced his choices in that respect....eg..only liking women of lighter shade or race than you because you have been schooled in the belief that people of your shade or race are aesthetically inferior, hence getting a partner from a desired race or hue will improve your social standing.

right.. now we cooking with gas.. and the thing is this.. if on speaking with a particular black man, a woman understands that he deals with non-black women for that reason then i can see having an issue wth that cos that would be some sort of intrinisic self hate.. but a lot of times that is NOT the case.. women see a black man and a white woman walk down the street and jump up and judge the people's union as if they were being asked for their sordid opinions.. nobody is preventing them from dating out of the race.. they CHOOSE to self-limit so why try to impose your own rigid standards on others who may not hold such a myopic view of the world.. is like you dont know the black man from adam, dont know what he's been through, but get an attitude when you see him with a snowflake.. why? ..

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I speak softly.. and carry a.. yo bump that stick ish.. I carry a H&K UMP .45 cal sub-machine gun

One who has been schooled to believe that one race is aesthetically superior is not going to tell you that was the reason he chose a mate lol...I know a guy from Ja who only had lite skin girls in Jamaica..when he migrated he “upgraded” and got a white girl...I am sure he probably loves his girl and she loves him and he can tell u million reasons why they are together...but it is highly likely the that some of what was inculcated about beauty both directly or indirectly from a tender age restricted his choices....but I see your point that it can be a matter of speculation..but that still does nothing to the argument I made about the reason for the resentment.


Next...I don’t think black women have restricted their choices..but rather they have been restricted....black women were historically put across as being promiscuous, oversexed beings etc….yourself spat out a lot of the stereotypes under the mistaken guise that you were only describing African Americans…those same stereotypes restrict the desirability of black women as suitable wives for other races…..on the other hand, a black man was proclaimed to be a stud, a star athlete, superior in vigor etc…albeit with negative stereotypes…but money and privilege goes a far way in exculpating him from any such negativity and further accentuates is positive image.