IslandMix - Soca, Reggae, Zouk and Caribbean Entertainment

May 12, 2006
Repression Expression
Passive Aggressive Behavior
If you've ever found yourself repressing your anger and behaving in other ways to get your point across, you may be someone who is adept at engaging in passive-aggressive behavior. Although passive-aggressive behavior is recognized as a psychological disorder, it also describes the behavior that many people use to cope with confrontational situations. Such behavior has the outward appearance of being peaceful, yet it is really an attempt to express oneself in seemingly passive ways-usually without accepting responsibility for doing so. For example, someone who doesn't want to attend an event with a partner might engage in behavior that causes them to be late or miss the event without ever admitting to their partner that they never wanted to go to the function at all. Procrastination, inefficiency, stubbornness, and sullenness are some of the many ways that anger can be expressed indirectly.

It is important not to judge ourselves when we engage in passive-aggressive behavior. You may want to consider that you are not owning your feelings or your expression by indirectly expressing yourself. Perhaps you are judging your feelings and needs as wrong-which is why you are expressing yourself indirectly. You also may be worried that others will judge you for feeling the way that you do. Remember that anger and every other emotion are never good or bad. They can, however, become toxic of you don't express them in healthy and proactive ways. When we express ourselves directly, we are more likely to be heard by the other person. It also becomes easier for us to ask for and get what we want.

Once we learn to be honest with ourselves about our feelings, we can begin to directly express ourselves to others. By learning to express ourselves directly, we prevent misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and resentment from cropping up in our relationships. We also learn to communicate with others in healthy and productive ways. It is never too late to start working on ourselves and our behaviors, just take it one day at a time.

Ancientwomyn,if one engages in passive-agression,I'm I right by saying that that person is acting in a deliberate manner?On the flip side one can act subconsciously.So that passive-aggression can be of a deliberate or subconscious behaviour?

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Recently I saw Latoya Jackson on ABC's THE VIEW. I noticed her hands look the same shade/color as Sherri's but her face, neck was light?

Does she have Vitiligo too? Pray tell...

No. passive-aggression is NOT subconscious behavior.

Example:

A woman finds out that her man wants to go to dancehall fete. She hates reggae/dancehall, but wants to support her man. Everytime they go to a club, either she gets sick, has to work late, or they get into an argument. There's nothing subconscious about these actions.

Yuh got a point there......Sounds intentional