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Thread: PERFECT advice column

  1. #1
    PartyLikeARockStar alvarez313's Avatar alvarez313 is offline
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    PERFECT advice column

    Found this on another site..

    IF MEN WROTE Advice Columns (FUNNY..)

    Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.

    A: Obviously your husband cannot get
    enough of you! Knowing that there is
    only one of you he can only settle for
    the next best thing, your best friend.
    Far from being an issue, this can only
    bring you closer together. Why not get
    some of your old college roommates
    involved too? If you are still
    apprehensive, maybe you should
    let him be with your friends without
    you. If you're still not sure then just
    perform oral sex on him and cook him a
    nice meal while you think about it.


    Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.

    A: Do it. Semen can help you lose weight
    and gives a great glow to your skin.
    Interestingly, men know this. His offer
    to allow you to perform oral sex on him
    is totally selfless. This shows he loves
    you. The best thing to do is to thank
    him by performing it twice a day: then
    cook him a nice meal.

    Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.

    A: This is perfectly natural behavior
    and it should be encouraged. The man
    is a hunter and he needs to prove his
    prowess with other men. A night out
    chasing young single girls is great
    stress relief and can foster a more
    peaceful and relaxing home. Remember,
    nothing can rekindle your relationship
    better than the man being away for a
    day or two (it's great time to clean
    the house too!) Just look at how
    emotional and happy he is when he
    returns to his stable home. The best
    thing to do when he returns home is
    for you and your best friend to perform
    oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice
    meal.

    Q: My husband doesn't know where my ################oris is.

    A: Your ################oris is of no concern to
    your husband. If you must mess with it
    do it in your own time or ask your best
    friend to help. You may wish to videotape
    yourself while doing this, and present it
    to your husband as a birthday gift.
    To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral
    sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.

    Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

    A: You are a bad person for bringing it
    up and should seek sensitivity training.
    Foreplay to man is very stressful and time
    consuming. Sex should be available to your
    husband on demand with no pesky requests for
    foreplay. What this means is that you do
    not love your man as much as you should.
    He should never have to work to get you
    in the mood. Stop being so
    selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to
    him by performing oral sex on him and
    cooking him a nice meal.

    Q: My husband always has an orgasm
    then rolls over and goes to sleep
    without giving me one.

    A: I'm not sure I understand the
    problem. Perhaps you've forgotten
    to cook him a nice meal

  2. #2
    Truly Blessed sweet trini ting's Avatar sweet trini ting is offline
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    Steups.. allyuh fellas always tinkin about allyuh belly....

  3. #3
    Registered User sexi_callaloo's Avatar sexi_callaloo is offline
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    so why we hadda cook him a nice meal after evryting.....aye if u was my husband...living by DAT advice,

  4. #4
    sexynorass Troubleandensome's Avatar Troubleandensome is offline
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    Angry

    i agree wit sexy callaloo u cyah be my man and living by dem rules yuh mad or what?

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