IslandMix

A man died and went to Heaven.

As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked St. Peter, 'Wah dem clocks for?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone's Lie-Clocks. Every time you tell a lie the hands on your clock move.'

'Or hor', said the man. 'So who clock is that?' he asked pointing to a gold clock on the wall

'That's Mother Teresa's', replied St. Peter. 'The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Eh heh?', said the man. 'And who clock is that one?' he asked again, pointing to a huge silver clock on the wall

St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life.'

'So where Patrick Manning clock?' asked the man.

'Manning's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan.'

Good one...

Oh shyte!