IslandMix

Actual letter of resignation from an employee at Zantex
Computers, USA, to her boss, who must have resigned very soon
afterwards!



Dear Mr. Baker,


As an employee of an institution of higher education, I have a few very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors have an intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel. After your consistent and annoying harassment of my co-workers and myself during the commission of our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the few true genetic wastes of our time.



Asking me, a network administrator, to explain every little
nuance of everything I do each time you happen to stroll into my
office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious
oxygen. I was hired because I know how to network computer systems, and you were apparently hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who watch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of "cut and paste" for the hundredth time. You will never understand computers. Something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. You will also never understand why people hate you, but I am going to try and explain it to you, even though I am sure this will be just as effective as telling you what an IP is. Your shiny new iMac has more personality than you ever will.


You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking
for fault in others. You have a sharp dressed useless look about
you that may have worked for your interview, but now that you
actually have responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff,
hoping their talent will cover for your glaring ineptitude. In a
world of managerial evolution, you are the blue-green algae that
everyone else eats and laughs at. Managers like you are a sad proof of the Dilbert principle.
Seeing as this situation is unlikely to change without you
getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my
resignation, however I have a few parting thoughts.



1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is
illegal for you to give me a bad recommendation. The most you can say to hurt me is "I prefer not to comment." I will have friends randomly call you over the next couple of years to keep you honest, because I know you would be unable to do it on your own.

2. I have all the passwords to every account on the system,
and I know every password you have used for the last five years. If you decide to get cute, I am going to publish your "favorites
list", which I conveniently saved when you made me "back up" your useless files. I do believe that terms like "Lolita" are not
usually viewed favorably by the administration.

3. When you borrowed the digital camera to "take pictures of
your Mother's birthday", you neglected to mention that you were
going to take nude pictures of yourself in the mirror. Then you
forgot to erase them like the techno-moron you really are. Suffice
it to say I have never seen such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but
I assure you that those have been copied and kept in safe places
pending the authoring of a glowing letter of recommendation. (Try to use a spell check please, I hate having to correct your
mistakes.)


Thank you for your time, and I expect the letter of
recommendation on my desk by 8:00 am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody and all of your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the public. Never mess with your systems administrator.
Why? Because they know what you do with all that free time!



Wishing you a grand and glorious day

That was hilarious!


(**make list to check what I have on company's computer**)

WOW! :p

wish i had that kinda dirt on my supervisor

D-D-D-D-D-D-D-DAMN!!!!!!!!

dat is exactly what goes on at our office...lol...,I'm using that when I leave!

i wonder if it works on professors

read this a dozen times, but it makes me laugh every time