WELL HERE IS THE MARRIED PERSPECTIVE
I had a traditional catholic wedding, and we had the opportunity add our own words to the traditional vows, however since i reach almost an hour late to the church the priest cut half the ceremony down cause 5 pm mass was about to start and i now coming down de aisle.
But my wedding reception was very personal, i knew 95% of the people there (my mother had her own cheerleading section of her friends i met for the first time) Every person who got up to say something put tears in my eyes, and my husband made an hour long speech as to how much he loves me.
My law school friends (mostly white) who attended my wedding said it was the best wedding they had ever been (referring to the love by all that was felt in the room)
I had 100 people at my ceremony, those 100 people meant something to me (and my mother  ), i did n't invite people just for show or cause.
While a lot of it maybe "pomp and circumstance" when there are hard days i look at my wedding pictures and remind myself of how i felt that day and somehow that reflection helps me from not strangling baxters on many occasions 
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